Controlling Your Emotions: A Simple 3-Step Strategy

Controlling Your Emotions: It’s no secret that emotions can be powerful things. They can drive us to do both great and terrible things. But what many people don’t realize is that we have a lot more control over our emotions than we think.

There are entire industries built around exploiting our emotions, from marketing to clickbait headlines. But there are also some very simple things we can do to take back control of our emotions and use them to our advantage.

In this article, we’ll explore a three-step strategy for controlling your emotions. This strategy can be used in any situation where you’re feeling emotional, whether it’s anger, fear, anxiety, or even happiness.

1) Recognize the emotion you’re feeling.

The first step to controlling your emotions is to simply become aware of what you’re feeling. This may seem obvious, but it’s often harder than it sounds. Our emotions can be very powerful, and they can sometimes blind us to what’s really going on.

To become aware of your emotions, you’ll need to start paying attention to your body. What physical sensations are you experiencing? Do you feel tightness in your chest or a knot in your stomach? Are your palms sweaty or your heart racing?

These physical sensations are all clues that can help you identify the emotion you’re feeling. Once you’ve identified the emotion, label it as best you can. For example, “I’m feeling angry right now.”

2) Identify the source of the emotion.

The next step is to try and identify the source of the emotion. What, specifically, is causing you to feel this way?

For example, if you’re feeling anger, what triggered it? Was it something someone said or did? Or was it a situation you found yourself in? If you’re feeling anxiety, what are you worried about? And if you’re feeling happy, what’s making you feel that way?

This step is important because it can help you deal with the emotion more effectively. If you know what’s causing the emotion, you can take steps to address the issue directly.

3) Decide how you want to respond.

The final step is to decide how you want to respond to the emotion you’re feeling. This is where you take back control of your emotions and use them to your advantage.

There are two main ways to respond to emotions:

  • The first is to react emotionally, which means letting the emotion dictate your behavior. For example, if you’re feeling anger, you might lash out at the person who upset you. Or if you’re feeling anxiety, you might avoid the situation that’s causing it.
  • While reacting emotionally can sometimes be helpful, it’s often not the best option. It can lead to impulsive decisions that we later regret. And it can make the situation worse instead of better.
  • The second way to respond is to act rationally, which means making a decision based on logic and reason, rather than emotion. For example, if you’re feeling anger, you might take a deep breath and count to 10 before doing or saying anything. Or if you’re feeling anxiety, you might mentally list the reasons why there’s nothing to be worried about.
  • This is usually the better option, as it allows us to stay in control of our emotions and make decisions that are in our best interest.


1) What are some other ways to control my emotions?

There are a few other things you can do to control your emotions, such as:

  • Identify your triggers. What are the things that usually make you feel this way? Once you know what they are, you can try to avoid them or be prepared for them.
  • Use positive self-talk. This means talking to you in a positive, reassuring way. For example, if you’re feeling anxiety, you might say something like, “I can handle this. I’m just feeling a little nervous right now.”


So there you have it, a simple three-step strategy for controlling your emotions. The next time you’re feeling emotional, try recognizing the emotion, identifying the source of it, and then deciding how you want to respond. By taking back control of your emotions, you can use them to your advantage, instead of letting them control you.